Small Victories .......

This morning I awoke safely tucked up in my own bed, the foot was tired but OK, no traction, hospital beds or fractures- PHEW!............
Phew because last night I Skied ! Yes SKIED !
Oh how happy am I this morning :-) My Inner self was dancing victoriously last night & still going this morning when I woke up.

I didn't manage to persuade my employers to let me tag on a trip to Canada in April after my weeks work in California as I was hoping but  my lovely man is taking his two sons skiing to Morzine, France for Easter & in an impetuous moment I agreed to fly out & join them for 4 days before I fly to LA. So after much deliberation & of course shopping for the right outfit (Yes...... all the gear & no idea!) I decided that a couple of lessons on the artificial snow slopes in the UK could be a sensible plan. So last night was my first lesson. I have skied once before, a couple of months before I broke the foot I had a week at ski school in the three valleys & although it was hard work, challenging & scary I had got bitten by the bug & have really wanted to try it again since my Lisfranc.

I nervously met my instructor & after coaxing my foot into the ski boot off I went, out onto the nursery slope. To begin with I had forgotten most of the basics, my legs were shaking with fear & the butterflies in my stomach were more like a fast spin on your washing machine cycle. Anyway my instructor was very patient & we went through some warm up exercises, including jumping with my skis on would you believe ? "Now I want you to jump" my instructor said, I looked at him open mouthed & after swallowing back the "NO, I DO NOT JUMP!" that my brain was screaming I bit the bullet & did it.
Just a few inches from the snow but I did it.
After nearly an hour of hard work practising snow ploughing, trying to turn & testing my leg strength I did manage a controlled run down the slope of about 50 meters with turns & stopped neatly at the bottom. I was knackered I can tell you and sweaty and hot but absolutely thrilled !
The toughest bit was taking the mental leap of faith. Physically I was fine (although very glad I'd been working out at the gym & aware that lots more work is needed) but mentally I was apprehensive to say the least. But by breaking it down into baby steps & gradually working my way up the slope I got to a point where I felt relatively safe & happy.
So there you go, we can recover from Lisfranc to a point where life becomes fun again !
I have one more lesson in the UK in two weeks, then I'm off to Morzine. They've just had another 5 cm of snow, conditions are good according to the reports so I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it stays that way until we go. I'll let you know how I get on .......

2013 is here already ?

Happy New Year Everyone !

I hope you are all doing well in your respective recoveries ? Still making progress, not looking back I hope :-)

I am participating in a regular gym programme now, managing 45 minutes in the gym, 3 times a week & I think I can see real improvement. My balance seems to be better, my walking pace is quicker, I can actually stride & my weight has stabilised. I need to get much stronger & I do need to lose a few more pounds (the bikini pics from Hawaii told me so :-)) but I'm hoping that sticking with this programme will reap further rewards in these areas. My latest 'new tricks' with the foot are; I can run up the stairs &  stand balancing on one foot; the dodgy one !- Woohoo.........
The foot is still painful & stiff most days, but not all day everyday & I can manage the pain. I believe that the gym work helps with increasing the blood flow by improving the circulation, this in turn helps with my mobility, I'm sure.
I am settling in well into my new role within my new company, off to a slow start but I've got positive vibes about this year being a good one, all round !
Hawaii in October was immense, I did celebrate my 40th on the beach in Maui, with a beautiful dinner at Mama's Fish house, after watching the sun set on the beach. I swam with the turtles, I was nervous & apprehensive due to the lack of personal fitness, but hey....... I did it & I saw dolphins too !

We drove the road to Hana 3 times to take in all of the sights & watching the sun rise at Haleakala was so incredibly moving & well, helps you put a bit of perspective on things :-)
I climbed the Pipiwai trek/trail  to see the Waimoku waterfalls, the uneven ground made it awkward for me & painful at times but hey ........ I did it !
So my plans so far for this year ? 1) Skiing, hopefully in Canada in April after a work trip takes me to California. 2) Get back out on the water & sail PROPERLY, hopefully complete the Round The Island Yacht Race in June. 3) Make a success of my new job & get myself back on top. 4) Hopefully buy my own house or save enough to be able to do it early 2014. 5) Put the difficult times behind me, finally.

Big plans I know, but the real difference is I've made some this year. To me this simple realisation says a lot about how I am continuing to improve & move forwards. I've continued with my photography as well, did I mention that I'd bought myself a DSLR a few months after breaking the foot ?
I had thought about it for so many years. I'd previously studied Photography at college using a Canon SLR you see & being a creative soul I had missed it. So I have been taking a few snaps & teaching myself the basics............. I took nearly 700 in Hawaii alone- LOL . I have also enrolled on a photography college course in Feb, I've decided that I need some technical direction to train my creativity into what I want to produce Haha & I'm hoping to make a few friends in my new area. Who knows what this year will hold........ exciting eh ?

Looking forward & enjoying it !

It's been a busy time here in Blighty with the 2012 Olympic fever which has been gripping the nation !

I can't tell you how wonderful it is to finally be able to blog about how happy I am & how well I feel.
I did lose my job as I feared I would. In fact just a few days after my last posting I was notified of my probable redundancy. It was a shock when it was confirmed even though I'd had my own fears for a few months. Of course I sought legal advice etc, but after a difficult few months deliberating over what to do I have decided not to look back !

I have been attending hydrotherapy now for 2 1/2 months & it has helped me immensely, god I wish I'd done this a while ago. I was referred after my last relapse in April & I seem to have gone from strength to strength in the past couple of months. I am still only able to wear flat supportive shoes but I am not utilising the metatarsal bar & appear to be coping very well without it. I have focused much more on the foot recently, taking notice when I am in pain & developing an awareness of the amount of time I spend on it etc. Resting it when it needs it & accepting that pushing it beyond it's limits (I.E ignoring the pain) is detrimental to my long term recovery. I realise that all of these points may seem obvious to anyone reading this, but I am a strong willed, stubborn & determined personality, accepting the restrictions that having a serious injury bring has not been easy for me to do.
The positive of being made redundant has been that I have been able to take a couple of months out to rehabilitate the foot with my focused attention. I have not had to drive 7-800 miles per week & rely on Ibuprofen to get me through the day. I have also registered & got a rehabilitative programme organised with the local gym. At the moment it is all sedentary stuff & not too demanding. But it's a start & I'm grateful to finally be at this point after so many setbacks !
I have been swimming & took a holiday to Bermuda last month. I spent all of my time in flip flops & swimming or snorkelling. The freedom of movement I experienced was so uplifting, I think it gave me a sneek preview into what my life could be like without pain & with improved mobility which has spurred me on to work harder at getting fit :-)
I returned home in love with Bermuda, such a beautiful island with friendly people & a wonderful climate.............. I will return :-)

I visited Weymouth at the start of the Olympics to take in some of the sailing action (spectator only) & stayed in a holiday park nearby which had a dry ski slope. I decided to take this opportunity to see If I could get the foot into a ski boot & to attempt a couple of very gentle runs down the nursery slope. The good news was that I could get the boot on, my confidence was low & I struggled with the reduced muscle in my right leg. But this was also a positive experience, as it left me with a clear understanding of what work I would need to do to be able to enjoy skiing again, importantly I feel that I can now allow myself to look forward to being able to do it again one day.
I walked for a couple of miles & some of it was quite uneven & tricky, even involving a little bit of climbing during the visit to Duurdle door, but the sense of achievement on reaching the top was exhilarating !
I've also purchased a second hand bike for myself & have been out on a two mile bike ride. Not exactly a marathon, but again a start & an important step in the direction that I have wanted to go for so long.
 I still require Ibuprofen most days, but only maybe one or two doses, I'm no longer dependant on it to be able to do things.
In October I am going on a trip to Hawaii & I'm determined to be fitter & stronger than I am now, what I can achieve will depend on what I can do & my commitment to getting fitter I know but I certainly am looking forward to being able to be mobile & strong enough to enjoy this trip to its maximum. I also want to try to go on a ski trip next Feb perhaps, so I will set that as a goal to work towards whilst I'm at the gym.
Maybe it's the whole Olympic fever surrounding the Team GB successes or just that I've finally reached a turning point in my recovery, but what's really great these days is how much more positive I feel in myself, I am now allowing myself to look forward & dare I say it -to a life beyond Lisfranc !

Transfer metatarsalgia ?

I subsequently underwent two MRI scan examinations in the end, the first didn't include enough detail on my forefoot to accurately determine if it was fractured or not......
I visited my consultant to receive the verdict & much to my surprise no fractures were seen, stress or otherwise. My consultant expressed his surprise at this result, stating that he was as sure as I was that a stress fracture would be the culprit of this latest bout of pain. My consultant involved another specialist when reviewing my MRI images & after discussions & a diagnosis elimination the consensus of opinion appears to be that I am suffering from transfer metatarsalgia............

This is believed to be the result of the mid foot fusion that I underwent as part of my Lisfranc surgery, essentially my 2nd, 3rd & possible 4th metatarsals are now too long. The bio dynamics of my foot have altered following the surgery apparently & this has resulted in a change to how my weight is distributed within my foot & how my foot manages this. Additional length in my metatarsals will cause them to weight bear beyond the amount they should, this also causes the metatarsal heads to become inflamed thus causing significant pain & discomfort like I have been experiencing within my toes. So the prescribed course of action is to first wean the foot back out of the boot & into my MBT's (Fitflop). When I can walk relatively comfortably I will then meet with a physio who will fit a metatarsal bar into my shoes. This should relieve the pressure in my toes. The metatarsal bar will get my foot back into proper alignment when I stand or walk, it simply takes the weight off of the metatarsal bones which should relieve my pain instantly.
Failing this then a metatarsal osteotomy would be required to permanently shorten my toes- Eeek !

It has now been 17 days since I put the boot back on so I decided to try a day without it yesterday, the result was quite a bit of building discomfort in my mid foot, particular increase in acute pain when my foot was positioned with the weight into the heel & lower than my fore & mid foot. The foot was quite red & puffy afterwards, although this settled down after a couple of hours. The building pain is significant enough however to prevent me from walking for any length of time at the moment. The feeling in my mid foot is quite bizarre, more of a nerve sensation, similar to when you have burnt yourself & the area affected projects that tingly slightly numb sensation. When I touch it it feels like this too, so I am wondering if the real problem lies within the mid foot area. but I am not a doctor so I feel obliged to follow the advise given & hope for some improvement. I am back in the boot today to give it a rest & will try again to hobble about without it for a few hours this afternoon.
It is a worry as I have had to take time off from work again & even now I am working from home, this cannot be a long term arrangement as my role requires me to visit customers on site & to travel significant distances. My company will not support me indefinitely I don't think & let's face it at the moment I am not able to fulfil the role I was employed for :-(

But I realise that I must focus on my long term health & recovery as my family & friends advise me to, if I need to change employment due to this injury then I will, there is very little that I can do about that except heed advice & try to recover as best as I can, the foot is in the driving seat at the moment, well that's what it feels like anyway !

Return of the boot !

Ello, ello, ello,

Yes it's been a while hasn't it ?
I was so astonished to see that I'd had over 4000 hits when I logged on last night !
Thanks to all of you that have read my woeful tale :-) I have been quite miserable in some of the posts I've made ,I noticed, but then It's been a crap year for me ! A Lisfranc fracture is not funny & I'm not superstitious but I do find myself being careful around mirrors & ladders these days !
It has been probably the most difficult & challenging year of my life, not just because of the foot....
Where shall I start to bring you all up to date?
I think where I last left you will probably make the most sense....

Sadly I haven't been away pirouetting on the foredeck, or trekking up Mount Kilimanjaro :-(

When I returned from my road trip to the US last October, I learnt that my dear Grandfather Pete was seriously ill, so ill in fact he died just three weeks later. This event was devastating to me, more so than the consultation with Mr Ritchie last April when I learnt the full extent of the damage to my right foot.

We were best friends you see, really true best friends.
When together we were always in cahoots, giggling together about the silly daft things that our mutual sense of humours connected on, often hiding away together when I was a young child in his woodworking shed from my quite strict Gran when she was on the war path !
In fact I think my Grandfather gave me my love of the sea & all things salty ! As soon as I was old enough to walk he got me a life jacket & took me sea fishing with him off of the coast of Hastings in East Sussex. This was the way I would spend most of my summer holidays with him right up until the age of 13 or 14. My grandfather taught me all of the essential things that a young lady should know, like how to thread lugworm onto a fishing hook, how to cast a decent line, how to tell the difference between a Flatty & a Plaice (fish!) & of course how to tell a decent pint of beer from a wrong 'un', although not this lesson until I was of the legal age to consume alcohol of course :-)
I experienced my first man overboard with him on Emma 1 (of course it was me) & my first rescue by the RNLI when the new radio he'd installed on Emma 2 failed when we were out at sea. My grandfather found this event most exciting & whilst I was being uplifted from the boat by the RNLI, he got his camera out to photograph the entire proceedings- LOL

So it all came as a huge shock to me, to lose him so quickly & unexpectedly, the foot actually became second priority to my grief for the best part of six months. He'd appointed me as his executor in his will as my Gran had died 14 years previously. I carried out all of his wishes as best as I could & then after much soul searching I decided to leave my birth place- Tunbridge Wells for a fresh start. I found a house in Addlestone, Surrey, closer to my work, my son, the rest of my family & my man. Yes, my man did hang around (see earlier posts about my worry & self doubt) & he has proven himself to be my rock during this difficult period. I often wonder at his unwavering support & faith in me as he'd only known me for a few months before my life was turned upside down.
I moved to Addlestone on April the 4th, the house is lovely but a project. It needs extensive redecoration & repair as well as having a garden that needs designing from scratch. So I spent the first three weeks in April decorating & cleaning the house with my man in earnest & we travelled to London on April 22nd to watch a great friend of mine compete in the London marathon. The foot was behaving well, a little tender at the end of the day but that was about it. I discussed climbing Mt Snowdon with my friends that evening, I planned to join the local gym the following week & my man had just booked me a trip to Hawaii in October this year to celebrate my 40th birthday.

Then on April 27th after a few days of feeling a little more tender than usual I got out of bed & upon standing I experienced acute pain through my 2nd & 3rd toes. I presumed that I'd just overdone it, I took some Ibuprofen (Aadvil to all you Americans ) & continued with my day hoping for the best.  On the Monday evening (30th) I caved in & drove myself to the local hospital casualty department, by now walking was extremely difficult, I couldn't bend my big toe at all & the pain wasn't responding to the Ibuprofen. I had a standard X-Ray & it didn't show any fractures (neither did the one I had last September) but the doctor decided to refer me to the fracture clinic the following Friday as a precaution in view of my history. I declined the offer of Tramadol & decided to persevere with the Co Codamol & Ibuprofen that I had stocked up at home.
After driving some 700 miles for work over the next three days I arrived at the Fracture clinic sore & feeling slightly unwell. I met Mr Monk- an Orthopaedic & Trauma consultant who browsed my X-Rays with considerable interest & read the letters I'd taken with me that detailed the details of my original injuries, previous surgery & then the second fracture in September. He informed me that he was very experienced in Lisfranc injuries & expressed sympathy at my latest predicament. He recommended an MRI examination & a referral to his private clinic as the current waiting list for the NHS service was around six weeks. Luckily my health insurance provider approved this & it was arranged for the following Tuesday (8th May). Mr Monk also strapped my foot back into an Aircast boot & presented me with another pair of crutches, precautionary but essential as was the ban on driving he explained :-)
Oh the irony wasn't lost on my either, the date ? Well it was the 4th May, exactly 13 mths since my original injury..........
So I had the MRI & met with Mr Monk this evening for the results, the good news, no fractures detected, the not so good news was that the radiologist omitted my toes from the scan ! Mr Monk puzzled over my symptoms, he commented that I was a mystery as both he & the expert radiologist he'd asked to interpret & report on the MRI were convinced as was I that I'd developed a stress fracture in either my 2nd, 3rd or 4th metatarsal. A second MRI of the front of my foot has now been booked for next Monday (14th May) with a further follow up consultation booked for the 15th with Mr Monk.  Morton's Neuroma was also mentioned by Mr Monk as a possible diagnosis;

Morton's neuroma is a condition that affects the nerve between the toes. The nerve becomes irritated and compressed, which results in severe pain on the ball of the foot and at the base of the toes.
Morton's neuroma usually affects the nerve between the third and fourth toes. It is rare for more than one nerve or foot to be affected apparently.

So A further week of minimum weight bearing, in the Aircast & no driving awaits me now. I have limited Internet access at home due to no WiFi as yet so I re subscribed to SKY TV today just to relieve some of the boredom. I will have to sit on my hands to stop myself from getting up & grabbing a paintbrush or doing any more of the various DIY jobs that are outstanding in the house. I must admit I'm now doubting myself, I pondered on the way home if the pain really was that bad or was it just me being nervous about the foot ? When I got home I removed the boot & tried to walk around the house, yes the pain is still there, between my 1st & 2nd metatarsal, maybe not as acute as it was but enough to prevent me from walking normally. So I will just have to await the verdict on Tuesday.

I also received the results from my bone densitometry scan (DEXA) that my GP referred me for a month ago this week. It appears that I do have signs of Osteopaenia in my lower spine so it's a lifestyle change for me, from now on a careful diet & a lifetime's supply of Acal D3 (Prescription Strength Calcium & Vit D)! When my time comes to enter the Menopause then I will need a rescan & possibly more of the Alendronic Acid that I had following the fracture last September (Oh the joy !).

The positives; Well it's an Olympic year here in Blighty, Oh & we have the Queens Diamond Jubilee to look forward to ! Yay !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Heading South

The flight out to NYC from London Heathrow was smooth & on time, the foot was reasonably comfortable,able to be elevated for the entire time, due to the club seat/ beds. For some reason I was personally welcomed on board by the chief steward (?).

I had a wheelchair service at both of the airports which was really efficient & amazingly the Clexane syringes weren't even questioned. The scanner guy's comment on my hand luggage as it passed through the scanner was " Wow ! That's a lot of drugs." But everyone was kind & courteous, which made it much less of an embarrassment.

Swelling only became noticeably painful during the descent to landing in Newark.

So the weather was hot & sunny in Manhattan, around 78c on average. I spent most of Friday around Wall street, Seaport & Pier 17. Whilst sitting on the pier enjoying the sunshine, a couple of men who were engaged in slightly high pitched dialogue, were edging along towards me. One chap was moving backwards with the other a "Jackie Chan" lookalike moving towards him holding what looked like a flick knife. To start with I watched them with mild bemusement & wondered if they were acting out some sort of street theatre .......
People around me started to back away from them & move along the pier, getting their mobile phones & cameras out of their pockets etc while they did so.
As I looked at "Jackie Chan " I noticed his eyes were bulging & he had a deranged expression fixed on his face, the other guy was wearing an amiable smile, whilst speaking softly. He was big built but quite young I thought. Anyway, after watching these two dance around each other for a few moments,it became apparent to me that "Jackie Chan" clearly was wired, unhinged & serious ! I then noticed that I was the only person left sitting on the steps & considered to
myself how quickly I could move away from them on my crutches looking as inconspicuous as possible. I looked upwards & the upper levels were lined with crowds of people filming & taking photographs!
I got up slowly & inched my way along the pier sideways, crab like really, all the time
watching "Jackie Chan's" wild eyes but trying not to meet his gaze full on. Two lads ran past & then wrestled the Chinese guy unceremoniously to the deck in seconds. One of them sat on him while the other wrestled the suspected weapon from his grip. I looked at it, as it was thrown to the ground but i couldn't really make out what it was exactly other than it had a bright green plastic handle. Then the NYPD arrived, trussed up the little China man like a chicken ready for the oven & carried him away.
I mused for a while about the "what if's" & then headed to the Pacific grill for lunch which turned out to be a bit of a disappointment. The rest of my day was pretty uneventful after that, a bit of shopping, the Brooklyn bridge & a little bit of Little Italy & Chinatown.
We had dinner that night at The Waters Edge restaurant in Long Island, it has a complimentary water taxi service from the Skyport marina which provides stunning & romantic (take note Glenn) of the Manhattan skyline at night along with a complimentary glass of champagne The food is pretty good too !

Next morning the sun was shining high in the sky as we headed to Central Park. After a taxi ride we entered by the Lake & Boathouse & walked to them via Strawberry Field. I took the obligatory photograph of the Imagine mosaic & some great close ups of the bridge & staircase down to the fountain, before we hobbled around to the Loeb Boathouse. I couldn't believe our luck, we got a great table by the lake for lunch. The view was so beautiful, of people trying to row their boats around, of the sun glinting on the water & glowing through leaves on the trees. I ordered the Maine lobster roll & it was delectable, slightly sweet but not too chewy, delicious, the glass of bubbly complimented it perfectly too !

Afterwards another taxi ride, but this time to The Empire State building. Although I have been up it before (2005) I wanted to watch the sun set & hopefully capture a bit of it in some photographs .

We finished the day by heading to some bars just off of Broadway & the foot & I boogied to
Michael Jackson before heading back to the hotel.

Yesterday we drove over 700 miles (after getting lost) through West Virginia & along the Blue
Ridge to arrive in Greensboro NC. Lovely chappie has a two day course to attend before we can continue onwards to our next destination which is Cherokee.
Whilst chilling out & watching daytime tv in the hotel room I saw an advertisement for a male grooming gadget, it had a bright green plastic handle & looked very familiar ..

I'm hoping to be able o visit an Indian reservation & maybe have a pow wow with the Chief !

The foot is crossing the pond !

Good morning everyone,
Thank you for your comments, they were a lovely reminder that I'm not the only one dealing with these problems........

The news is, I've decided to go ahead with my trip. A distraction is what I need at the moment I've decided. After a few days of stewing, a few minor alterations to our plans, we are flying out of Heathrow T5 this evening!
My lovely chap (yes he did hang around,despite the foot)has booked me club class all the way to NYC. Which means the foot will travel in style & will be elevated the whole way.
I am back on the Clexane to hopefully fend off a possible DVT & we have organised wheelchair assistance through the airports on both sides of the pond.
We have cancelled both of our internal flights & now plan to drive from NYC to Greensboro NC before heading to Cherokee & the Smokies. The beauty of this is we can stop as often as the foot needs & run to our own schedule. We've even decided to include Philadelphia in our return journey back to NYC.

I brought a new DSLR a few months ago, so I will be snapping away & will try to post as often as I can. We plan to have dinner at The Waters Edge restaurant tomorrow evening (Birthday) which has stunning views from Long Island of the Manhattan skyline. We were there last November, on our 2nd date so it's sweet to be going back. I may try to watch the sunset from The Empire State building, I visited it in 2005 & perhaps a picnic in Central Park .......
I've also researched wheelchair hire companies, if it comes to it, I'll swallow a bit of pride & use one.
So for the next two weeks, it's not about the foot & what I can't do, it's about exploration, fun, adventure & me ;-)